God in our lives, even when we don't know it

I generally don't talk much about God or the effect He has had in our lives, but today I just felt the need to do so.

My husband and I got married a few months over 20 years ago. We were both working low paying jobs, but my husband was in his final semester of college so things would be looking up. He graduated in May and he started looking for work. He had a few interviews, but no offers, so we continued to work our minimum wage jobs. Then in late October, be discovered the birth control pills didn't work and thaI was pregnant.

We were happy, but at the same time deeply concerned about just how we were going to pay for the doctor and delivery. The week before Christmas, we got a call. He was offered a job in the central part of the state (we lived in the NE corner at the time, where both of our families were) and he would start on January 7th.

God was looking out for us.

We stayed in a hotel for a couple of days and while my husband worked, I looked for us a place to live. We signed lease papers on Wednesday afternoon. The rent was affordable and we had the option to buy. So we did. Signed the mortgage papers in mid-May before our beautiful daughter was born the first week of June.

God was providing for us.

A couple of years later, we discover again that birth control pills still don't work. I was pregnant. We had wanted to wait another couple of years and we just were not ready for another child. After the shock wore off, we were happy. It was a difficult pregnancy, with a lot of swelling and blood pressure that just would not stay under control. And in March, our son was born. By mutual consensus between us and the doctor, it was decided that we really didn't want any more children and that birth control pills obviously were not the best option for me. So during my second C-section, I had a tubal.

Then in 1997, when my daughter was 6 and my son was 3, I got sick. Rheumatoid Arthritis. And in 6 months I went from one inflamed joint to barely being able to walk or hold a pencil. It took almost 2 years to find a combination of meds that worked for me. I had to take a pregnancy test to prove that I wasn't because the side effects would have been devastating. 90% chance of miscarriage and a 99% of massive birth defects if carried to term.

God knew when I needed my children, even if it wasn't on our timetable.

During all of this time, we had been trying to keep up with the Joneses, but now with medical bills to added to the burden, we knew that would have to stop. We refinanced the house and cashed out enough equity to pay off the credit cards. We haven't picked one up since. We have paid off all of our debt except the house. Then my RA finally got bad enough that I just couldn't work any more. I was a hard decision to not work any more, I felt useless and like a burden to my family, but it gave me the time to do things I never had time to do. I finally decided, after not working for over 2 years, that I needed to apply for Disability. I took 2.5 years of paper work and worry, but in March of my daughter's Senior year, I was approved. My husband's job had gotten iffy due to lay-offs, so with the back pay, we recast our mortgage, again, and got the payment down so that we could live on my disability if we had to.

Again, God was looking out for us. He has provided for us and watched over us, even in we had almost given up hope.

Now, my husband is concerned about his job again, but when our son graduates High School and goes off to college, we will be free to move back to the NE corner of the state to be with family as they get older. And our home will be paid off, so when we sell, we will get to keep the money and pay cash for the next one.

God is indeed good. In every way.

Doing stuff for babies

I just love babies. Last year, a friend of ours had a new grandbaby and I spent a couple of happy months sewing for the little feller. This year my husbands nephew and his wife are having their first child in April.

They are so money strapped that they make church mice look wealthy by comparison, so I have stepped up to help out. I have crocheted a couple of blankets, a dress, and a sweater set for little Mollie. I also stopped by the local Goodwill store and picked up some really nice sleepers and onesies for her. I will let all of the baby showers provide most of the clothes because she will wind up with so many 0-3 months outfits that she won't be able to wear them all before she outgrows them. I will actually focus more on clothes for later.

They have done a great job repainting Mollie's room. But they are still lacking a few things. Like a rug for the floor (the carpet in there was just awful, so they pulled it up to show the nice wood floor underneath) and curtains. Those things I can do. Curtains are just stupid expensive. So I found some really adorable fabric that matches the theme and will be getting those made up sometime this week. And I am crocheting a rug for the room. Think of a rag rug in design only made of yarn. I think it will be really cute in there.

I love doing things for people. It not only gives me something to do with my time, I get to help those who can't do for themselves.

It is a good feeling.

Making Diapers

Well, it looks like i will be back in the diaper making business. My husband's nephew is going to have a baby in the spring. They are so excited. They have been married for 9 years and had given up being able to get pregnant. Now that they are, they don't know what to do with themselves.

They don't have a lot of money so we are going to do whatever we can to help them out. Cloth diapers will help a long way to saving them a lot of money, so that is what I am going to do.

I had made up a bunch, like 2 dozen, for a friend of ours who became a grandpa last Spring. They use a lot of disposables too, but now that Max has grown some, the diapers I made for him fit now. I think they are going to pass them back to us after he has outgrown them so Greg and Brandy can use them as well.

I like making the diapers. It only takes about half an hour to put one together and the materials aren't that expensive. Maybe $2.50 each. But the fact that it can be used over and over is a major plus on the money side. 20 diapers at $2.50 each is about $50. So if you figure that the baby can use each size for about 4-5 months, that is a big savings over disposables. Disposables might be only 36 cents (or so) each, but if you change your baby 5-6 times a day or more, that is $2.16 a day in something you are going to throw away. You can invest the $2.50 each in cloth diapers, and in less than a month, they have paid for themselves. And the cloth diapers are just too cute.

News...good and bad

Well, we had a little bit of unsettling news this past weekend. One of our friend's 16 year old daughter is pregnant. We are a little worried about her because she is so petite and so very young. But we are trying to be supportive of her and their family.

They have been barely making ends meet as it is. He is on disability and she is a waitress and that is essentially their only income. The daughter doesn't work, and the baby's daddy is only 15, not old enough to work. So we are going to do what we can to make it better for them.

The next time we see them will probably be New Years and she will probably be showing by then. I thought I might make her a couple of maternity tops since they really cannot afford to buy her a new wardrobe, especially at Christmas.

There is sooo much they are going to need. They will probably be able to find quite a bit at yard sales and flea markets, but you always want some new things too. I thought I would make up some baby clothes in a sort of unisex way until we find out whether it is a boy or girl. Maybe crochet a couple of blankets. Baby clothes do not take much fabric or much time to make, and I am definitely better at sewing than I was when my kids were babies. Although I did make my daughter a couple of dresses.

I did ask if they were going to use cloth or disposable diapers. Probably both, so I got to looking around for free patterns for cloth diapers on the web. They are so cute, and appear very easy to make. So I thought I might make up a few of those too.

If the situation were not so sad, I would be thrilled to be an honorary Grand Aunt. I think I would have prefered to wait a few years though.

Babies cost a fortune?

Living is a never ending cycle of things you think you have to buy. The problem is that we really don't NEED these things as much as we WANT them. Advertisers have convinced us that we cannot have a baby without a crib, changing table, diaper genie, baby monitor, stacks of disposable diapers, formula, bibs, special spoons and bottles, assorted baby medicines for teething, diaper rash, gas, special pacifiers that won't twist their teeth, teething rings, etc ad nauseum.

My kids got by without a lot of these thing simply because we didn't have the money to buy them. We didn't have a changing table, I changed diapers on the couch or the floor with a towel under them. A diaper genie was a waste of time so I had a diaper pail with a lid. Same thing but very low tech. No baby monitor either, we just left the door open a little so we could hear her if she woke up. I wanted to breast feed, but due to medical considerations at the time with my daughter, it wasn't possible so we did have the formula to deal with. I did breast feed my son at least until I went back to work. Then he was on formula too. No special spoons or pacifiers or bottle nipples, or any of that sort of thing. Their clothes were washed with the rest of the laundry in the same detergent. I didn't go for all of the special creams and salves designed for smearing over the diaper area. I used ointment only when there was a rash, and that wasn't very often. I think I only bought 1 package of Pullups. It is amazing how fast you can potty train a child when they wear the thick undies and plastic pants. I think I got them house broken in about two weeks, before their 3rd birthday.

All of the things you think you need are designed to separate you from your money. Literally Millions of babies survived without them in the past so we did too. And you know what? My children suffered no ill effects from the experience. Wow! Raising children the old fashioned way won't cause them to be abnormal, or less happy than if I buy the latest and greatest gadget for them.